A buddhist monk approaches a burger foodtruck and says "make me one with everything."
The buddhist monk pays with a $20 bill, which the vendor takes, puts in his cash box, and closes the lid.
"Where's my change?" the monk asks. The vendor replies, "change comes from within".
Noam Chomsky, Kurt Godel and Werner Heisenberg walk into a bar.
Heisenberg turns to the other and says "
Obviously this is a joke, but how can we tell if it's funny?" Godel replies "We can't know that because we're inside the joke.
" Chomsky says "Of course it's funny, you're just telling it wrong."
How do you tell the difference between a plumber and a chemist?
Ask them to pronounce unionized.
Helium walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve noble gases here." Helium doesn't react.