JOTD

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Possum Plagues at Houses of Worship
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The Presbyterian church called a meeting to decide what to do about their Possum infestation. After much prayer and consideration, they concluded that the Possums were predestined to be there, and they should not interfere with God’s divine will.

At the Baptist church, the Possums had taken an interest in the baptistery. The deacons met and decided to put a water-slide on the baptistery and let the Possums drown themselves. The Possums liked the slide and, unfortunately, knew instinctively how to swim, so twice as many Possums showed up the following week.

The Lutheran church decided that they were not in a position to harm any of God’s creatures. So, they humanely trapped their Possums and set them free near the Baptist church. Two weeks later, the Possums were back when the Baptists took down the water-slide.

The Episcopalians tried a much more unique path by setting out pans of whiskey around their church in an effort to kill the Possums with alcohol poisoning. They sadly learned how much damage a band of drunk Possums can do.

The Catholic church came up with a more creative strategy! They baptized all the Possums and made them members of the church. Now they only see the possums at Christmas and Easter.

The Jewish synagogue accepted one Possum and circumcised him. They haven’t seen a Possum since.
 
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The donkey told the tiger: The grass is blue.
The tiger replied: No, the grass is green.
The discussion became heated, and the two decided to submit the issue to arbitration, and to do so they approached the lion.
Before reaching the clearing in the forest where the lion was sitting on his throne, the donkey started screaming: ′′Your Highness, isn't it true that the grass is blue?"
The lion replied: "True, the grass is blue".
The donkey rushed forward and continued: ′′The tiger disagrees with me and contradicts me and annoys me. Please punish him".
The king then declared: ′′The tiger will be punished with 5 years of silence".
The donkey jumped with joy and went on his way, content and repeating: ′′The grass is blue"..
The tiger accepted his punishment, but he asked the lion: ′′Your Majesty, why have you punished me, after all, the grass is green?"
The lion replied: ′′In fact, the grass is green".
The tiger asked: ′′So why do you punish me?"
The lion replied:
That has nothing to do with the question of whether the grass is blue or green. The punishment is because it is not possible for a brave, intelligent creature like you to waste time arguing with a donkey, and on top of that to come and bother me with that question
The worst waste of time is arguing with the fool and fanatic who doesn't care about truth or reality, but only the victory of his beliefs and illusions. Never waste time on discussions that make no sense... There are people who for all the evidence presented to them, do not have the ability to understand, and others who are blinded by ego, hatred and resentment, and the only thing that they want is to be right even if they aren’t.
When ignorance screams, intelligence shuts up. Your peace and tranquillity are worth more.
 

Ive seen her in some videos and she seems like not all pistons are firing. Very slow and challenged at the minimum and she talks like shes got peanut butter in her mouth
 
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