JOTD
- Thread starter DanielM
- Start date
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A 65 year old woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital.
While on the operating table she had a near death experience..
Seeing God she asked : "Is my time up ?"
God said :
"No, you have another 33 years, 2 months and 8 days to live."
Upon recovery, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a Face-lift, liposuction, breast implants and a tummy tuck.
She even had someone come in and change her hair colour and brighten her teeth !
Since she had so much more time to live, she figured she might as
well make the most of it.
After her last operation, she was released from the hospital.
While crossing the street on her way home, she was killed by an ambulance.
Arriving in front of God, she demanded :
"God, you said I had
another 33 years to live ? Why didn't you pull me from out of the path of the Ambulance ?"
(You'll love this)
God replied :
"I didn't recognize you.......... !!!!!"
While on the operating table she had a near death experience..
Seeing God she asked : "Is my time up ?"
God said :
"No, you have another 33 years, 2 months and 8 days to live."
Upon recovery, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a Face-lift, liposuction, breast implants and a tummy tuck.
She even had someone come in and change her hair colour and brighten her teeth !
Since she had so much more time to live, she figured she might as
well make the most of it.
After her last operation, she was released from the hospital.
While crossing the street on her way home, she was killed by an ambulance.
Arriving in front of God, she demanded :
"God, you said I had
another 33 years to live ? Why didn't you pull me from out of the path of the Ambulance ?"
(You'll love this)
God replied :
"I didn't recognize you.......... !!!!!"
Hello everyone. I need a favour.
My cousin has 2 tickets for the 2019 Bathurst 1000, accomodation included! He paid $2,500 for each ticket, but didn't realize when he bought them last year, that it was going to be on the same day as his wedding.
If you are interested, he is looking for someone to take his place.
The wedding is at Cathedral Square in Brisbane at 12 pm. Her name is Lori, she is 5'5" about 127 lbs, good looking, a successful real estate agent and loves to cuddle... she'll be the one in the Zac Posen designer white wedding gown.
My cousin has 2 tickets for the 2019 Bathurst 1000, accomodation included! He paid $2,500 for each ticket, but didn't realize when he bought them last year, that it was going to be on the same day as his wedding.
If you are interested, he is looking for someone to take his place.
The wedding is at Cathedral Square in Brisbane at 12 pm. Her name is Lori, she is 5'5" about 127 lbs, good looking, a successful real estate agent and loves to cuddle... she'll be the one in the Zac Posen designer white wedding gown.
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