JOTD
- Thread starter DanielM
- Start date
- Status
Fascinating.
The intelligence of birds is amazing. Parrots are smart but crows are super smart.
What is the difference between 'Wife' and 'Girlfriend?
*Wife* is like a *TV* and *Girlfriend* is like a *MOBILE.*
At home you *watch* TV,
but when you go out you *take* your MOBILE.
Sometimes you *enjoy* TV, but most of the time, you *play* with your MOBILE.
TV is (as good as) *free* for life, but for the MOBILE, if you don't *pay,* the services will be *terminated.*
TV is *big, bulky* and most of the time *old,*
But the MOBILE is *cute, slim, curvy, replaceable* and *portable.*
Operational costs for TV is often *acceptable*
but for the MOBILE, it is often *high* and *demanding.*
TV has a *remote*
but MOBILE *doesn't.*
Most importantly, MOBILE is a *two-way communication* (you talk and listen), but with the TV, you *MUST only listen* (whether you want to or not)!
Last but not least!
Yet TVs are superior because TVs don't have *viruses,* but MOBILES often *do*
And mobiles can be easily *hacked* or *stolen.*
*Take Care*
Stick to TV only.
*Wife* is like a *TV* and *Girlfriend* is like a *MOBILE.*
At home you *watch* TV,
but when you go out you *take* your MOBILE.
Sometimes you *enjoy* TV, but most of the time, you *play* with your MOBILE.
TV is (as good as) *free* for life, but for the MOBILE, if you don't *pay,* the services will be *terminated.*
TV is *big, bulky* and most of the time *old,*
But the MOBILE is *cute, slim, curvy, replaceable* and *portable.*
Operational costs for TV is often *acceptable*
but for the MOBILE, it is often *high* and *demanding.*
TV has a *remote*
but MOBILE *doesn't.*
Most importantly, MOBILE is a *two-way communication* (you talk and listen), but with the TV, you *MUST only listen* (whether you want to or not)!
Last but not least!
Yet TVs are superior because TVs don't have *viruses,* but MOBILES often *do*
And mobiles can be easily *hacked* or *stolen.*
*Take Care*
Stick to TV only.
How BEDROOM smells after MARRIAGE:
First 3 years....
Perfumes, Flowers,
Chocolate,
Fruits...
�������������
After 3 years....
Baby Powder, Johnson's Cream and Lotions,
Baby Oils....
�������������
After 15 years....
Tiger balm, axe oil, methylsalicilate ointment
Vicks,
�������������
After 40 years....
Spiritual books, watching Tv alone
�������������
Four stages of marriage:
��Mad for each other,
�� Made for each other,
�� Mad at each other &
�� Mad because of each other
�������������
What's Marriage?
Answer- MARRIAGE Is The 7th Sense of Humans, that Destroys All The Six Senses and Makes The Person NON Sense..!
�������������
Definition Of Happy Couple -
HE Does What SHE Wants…
SHE Does What SHE Wants
�������������
Wife: Dear, this computer is not working as per my command....
Husband:
Exactly darling! its a computer, not a Husband..!!
�������������
'Laughing At Your Own Mistakes, Can Lengthen Your Life."
- Shakespeare
"Laughing At your Wife's Mistakes, can SHORTEN your Life...."
- Shakespeare's Wife
�������������
First 3 years....
Perfumes, Flowers,
Chocolate,
Fruits...
�������������
After 3 years....
Baby Powder, Johnson's Cream and Lotions,
Baby Oils....
�������������
After 15 years....
Tiger balm, axe oil, methylsalicilate ointment
Vicks,
�������������
After 40 years....
Spiritual books, watching Tv alone
�������������
Four stages of marriage:
��Mad for each other,
�� Made for each other,
�� Mad at each other &
�� Mad because of each other
�������������
What's Marriage?
Answer- MARRIAGE Is The 7th Sense of Humans, that Destroys All The Six Senses and Makes The Person NON Sense..!
�������������
Definition Of Happy Couple -
HE Does What SHE Wants…
SHE Does What SHE Wants
�������������
Wife: Dear, this computer is not working as per my command....
Husband:
Exactly darling! its a computer, not a Husband..!!
�������������
'Laughing At Your Own Mistakes, Can Lengthen Your Life."
- Shakespeare
"Laughing At your Wife's Mistakes, can SHORTEN your Life...."
- Shakespeare's Wife
�������������
Miss Beatrice, The church organist, was in her eighties, And had never been married. She was admired for her sweetness and kindness to all.
One afternoon the pastor came to call on her and she showed him into her quaint sitting room. She invited him to have a seat while she prepared tea.
As he sat facing her old Hammond organ, the young minister noticed a cute glass bowl sitting on top of it. The bowl was filled with water, and in the water floated, of all things, a..... condom!!!
When she returned with tea and scones, They began to chat..
The pastor tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of water and its strange floater, but soon it got the better of him and he could no longer resist.
'Miss Beatrice', he said, 'I wonder if you would tell me about this?' Pointing to the bowl.
'Oh, yes!' she replied, 'Isn't it wonderful? I was walking through the park a few months ago and I found this little package on the ground.
The directions said to place it on the Organ, keep it Wet and that it would prevent the spread of disease. .....Do you know ... I haven't had the flu all winter.'
.
One afternoon the pastor came to call on her and she showed him into her quaint sitting room. She invited him to have a seat while she prepared tea.
As he sat facing her old Hammond organ, the young minister noticed a cute glass bowl sitting on top of it. The bowl was filled with water, and in the water floated, of all things, a..... condom!!!
When she returned with tea and scones, They began to chat..
The pastor tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of water and its strange floater, but soon it got the better of him and he could no longer resist.
'Miss Beatrice', he said, 'I wonder if you would tell me about this?' Pointing to the bowl.
'Oh, yes!' she replied, 'Isn't it wonderful? I was walking through the park a few months ago and I found this little package on the ground.
The directions said to place it on the Organ, keep it Wet and that it would prevent the spread of disease. .....Do you know ... I haven't had the flu all winter.'
.
- Status