You have 2 cows...

Discussion in 'Markets & Economies' started by hawkeye, Apr 2, 2013.

  1. Golden ChipMunk

    Golden ChipMunk Well-Known Member

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    Two cows are standing next to each other in a field
    Daisy: I was artificially inseminated this morning.
    Dolly: I don't believe you.
    Daisy: It's true, straight up, no bull!
     
  2. Golden ChipMunk

    Golden ChipMunk Well-Known Member

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    Still can't find the Bull
     
  3. alor

    alor Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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    you can go buy some sperms from the bank, but who will volunteer to fertilized the cows, ask the neighbour for help. she does a nursery in towm.
     
  4. smk762

    smk762 Active Member Silver Stacker

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    You have two cows, and flood the paddock with bullshit because some turkey said it'll make it great again. Your soil improves, but the harvest goes to waste because there are no Mexicans allowed over the fence and you're not allowed to own slaves anymore. Soon enough the bullshit cakes your cows legs and they develop footrot and bovine respiratory disease. The turkey buys their emaciated corpses for a discount and sells them to the Hindus because he's a great negotiator and humanitarian.
     
  5. Golden ChipMunk

    Golden ChipMunk Well-Known Member

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    Quick milking the cat now
     
  6. SpacePete

    SpacePete Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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    At the supermarket, this sign was necessary:

    [​IMG]
     
  7. SpacePete

    SpacePete Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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    [youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FXI21S4ZWJU[/youtube]
     
  8. SpacePete

    SpacePete Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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  9. Golden ChipMunk

    Golden ChipMunk Well-Known Member

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    I have a Smart Cow that washes itself all day long

    [​IMG]
     
  10. SpacePete

    SpacePete Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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    You have one cat




































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    And he's a total boss.


    [​IMG]
     
  11. SpacePete

    SpacePete Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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  12. dross

    dross Active Member

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    You had one cat, now you have a freezer full of mud crabs, win win.
     
  13. JulieW

    JulieW Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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    My cousin was a professional cow insemination technician at one stage of his career. (He described it with a more colloquial term).

    Funniest thing I'd ever seen was him, showing us his trade, and up to his armpit in a cow as she marched him back and forth across the yard. Him yelling and trying to get her to stop. Me helpless with laughter unable to grab the halter.
     
  14. Golden ChipMunk

    Golden ChipMunk Well-Known Member

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    Do you ever eat mud crap?? crabs

    They are eaten freshly kill..

    Frozen mud crabs don't taste as nice after cook.... :lol:
     
  15. dross

    dross Active Member

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    Used to catch them by the dozens in the mangroves by hand, then meet grandad as he pulled up on his fishing trawler, they would go into a boiling 44 gal drum along with the lobsters.
     

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