Just with regards to charging the estate for your time (or not), keep track how much time you spend on it anyway. If any of the other beneficiaries gives you a hard time about realized prices later, you can whip it out your log and say "Well, that's not including 100 hours of my time at $25/hour but I can go get that court order if you want to be really pedantic". A friend of mine had a similar problem with an argumentative beneficiary too and produced the GPS logs from his car to show the ~5000 kms he'd had to travel in order to prepare the (remote) estate for sale. Easy to criticize then someone else is doing all the work for free. Sorry to hear about your loss.
