JOTD

Discussion in 'General Precious Metals Discussion' started by DanielM, Apr 30, 2013.

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  1. boston

    boston Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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    Lying about your age

    Bob, a 70-year-old, extremely wealthy widower, shows up at the Country Club with a breathtakingly beautiful and very sexy 25-year-old blonde-haired woman who knocks everyone's socks off with her youthful sex appeal and charm, and who hangs over Bob's arm and listens intently to his every word.

    His buddies at the club are all aghast.

    At the very first chance, they corner him and ask, 'Bob, how'd you get the trophy girlfriend?'

    Bob replies, 'Girlfriend? She's my wife!'

    They are knocked over, but continue to ask. 'So, how'd you persuade her to marry you?'

    'I lied about my age,' Bob replies.

    'What, did you tell her you were only 50?'

    Bob smiles and says, 'No, I told her I was 90.'
     
    boston, Feb 20, 2015
    #1041
  2. smk762

    smk762 Active Member Silver Stacker

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    The game of choice for unemployed people or maintenance level workers is basketball.

    The game of choice for frontline workers is football.

    The game of choice for middle management is tennis.

    The game of choice for CEOs and executives is golf.

    Conclusion: The higher up on the corporate ladder you are, the smaller your balls are.
     
    smk762, Feb 20, 2015
    #1042
  3. JulieW

    JulieW Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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    I used to get very depressed when I got home from work and sat down to watch the seven o'clock news and the current affairs programs.

    Then I discovered the History Channel and I'm happy.

    I get the news without the daily stress.
     
    JulieW, Feb 22, 2015
    #1043
  4. Boyo

    Boyo Active Member Silver Stacker

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    Agree..I was rooting for William the conquerer till I realised he was a frenchie and messed with all our fair saxon maidens

    Then they went on to bugger up the new world...where will it all end ? :D
     
    Boyo, Feb 22, 2015
    #1044
  5. Southerner

    Southerner Active Member Silver Stacker

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    [​IMG]




    .
     
    Southerner, Feb 23, 2015
    #1045
  6. SilverSurfer77

    SilverSurfer77 Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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    Chuck Norris threw a hand grenade and killed 100 people, then the hand grenade exploded.
     
    SilverSurfer77, Feb 23, 2015
    #1046
  7. boneyard

    boneyard Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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    [​IMG]
     
    boneyard, Feb 23, 2015
    #1047
  8. spannermonkey

    spannermonkey Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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    spannermonkey, Feb 23, 2015
    #1048
  9. Shaddam IV

    Shaddam IV Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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    From the story:

    So if RADAR and LIDAR have to be "reinforced by a valid speed estimation" why doesn't a "speed estimation" have to be backed up by RADAR or LIDAR?
     
    Shaddam IV, Feb 24, 2015
    #1049
  10. Stark

    Stark Active Member Silver Stacker

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    Funny, but none is true.

    Chuck Norris was born on 10th of March in 1940 (Martrys day in some countries). Interesting fact is that Bruce Lee was born in the same year.

    End of WWII (in Europe) is considered as 9th of May in 1945. At least in Russia, I think, they celebrate this as "Victory day".
     
    Stark, Feb 24, 2015
    #1050
  11. JulieW

    JulieW Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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    Chuck Norris bit off his own umbilical chord and drowned the priest who tried to baptise him.
     
    JulieW, Feb 25, 2015
    #1051
  12. Holdfast

    Holdfast Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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    Last Week Tonight with John Oliver: Stephen Hawking Interview

    [youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T8y5EXFMD4s[/youtube]
     
    Holdfast, Feb 25, 2015
    #1052
  13. Clawhammer

    Clawhammer Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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    [​IMG]
     
    Clawhammer, Feb 25, 2015
    #1053
  14. whinfell

    whinfell Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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    [​IMG]
     
    whinfell, Feb 25, 2015
    #1054
  15. Southerner

    Southerner Active Member Silver Stacker

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    [​IMG]


    .
     
    Southerner, Feb 25, 2015
    #1055
  16. boston

    boston Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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    Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwyllllantysiliogogoch

    On a beautiful summer's day, two American tourists were driving through Wales.

    At Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwyllllantysiliogogoch, they stopped for lunch.

    One of the tourists asked the waitress, 'Before we order, I wonder if you could settle an argument for us. Can you pronounce where we are, very, very, very slowly?'

    The girl leaned over and slowly said, 'Burrr gurrr king'.
     
    boston, Feb 25, 2015
    #1056
  17. Shaddam IV

    Shaddam IV Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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    [youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iU2hy0L5lgg[/youtube]
     
    Shaddam IV, Mar 1, 2015
    #1057
  18. JulieW

    JulieW Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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    [​IMG]
     
    JulieW, Mar 8, 2015
    #1058
  19. Ag-man

    Ag-man Active Member Silver Stacker

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    ^^^^^ L O L ^^^^^
     
    Ag-man, Mar 8, 2015
    #1059
  20. barsenault

    barsenault Well-Known Member

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    to the pure, all things are pure, is what the ancient script tells me. and when I write, lol, it means laugh out loud. Satan can take a hike if he think he owns that acronym.
     
    barsenault, Mar 8, 2015
    #1060
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