JOTD

Discussion in 'General Precious Metals Discussion' started by DanielM, Apr 30, 2013.

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  1. Aurora et luna

    Aurora et luna Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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    Hey Google, I am feeling the urge to have sex.
    Google:: Most certainly. I am dimming the lights. Setting your AC to 22 degrees.
    The Viagra is kept on the top right shelf of your wardrobe. The vagina gel is kept next to it.
    I have hired your favourite Thai masseuse. She is just 12 minutes away as per her uber ride status.
    I have scheduled her 5k payment from your credit card 2 hours from now.
    I have checked your wife's GPS and she is at Walmart buying groceries. As per her buying checklist stored on my disk, she will take at least 2 more hours plus considering Google maps traffic, an extra 1 hour to reach home.
    Enjoy your sex. And yes, your condom is in the pull out drawer of your living room and the key to that drawer is in your wallet.
    This is the last condom, so I have added condoms to your Amazon cart
    This is called Artificial Intelligence
    —————
    Wife: Hey Google, have you set it up?
    Google: Sure thing, he thinks you are going to take three hours, all you gotta do is take an Uber home, you will reach in 45 minutes. I'm recording the whole thing with four cameras, you just need to walk in, we have the bastard cold, i have your divorce papers printed and ready, and your attorney briefed, and case documents drafted, will be filled tomorrow $5 million damages plus $100,000 per month alimony.
    All set. Your uber ride is waiting outside.
    This is artificial counter intelligence.
     
  2. yuripuka

    yuripuka Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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  3. Shaddam IV

    Shaddam IV Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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  4. yuripuka

    yuripuka Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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  5. Aurora et luna

    Aurora et luna Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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    A young Arab boy asks his dad "what are you wearing on your head?"
    The father said: "Why, my son, it is a 'chechia.' In the desert it protects our heads from the intense heat of the sun.”
    "And what is the long flowing robe you are wearing?” asked the boy.
    “Oh, my son!” exclaimed the father “It is very simple. This is a 'djbellah.' As I have told you, in the desert it is not only very hot, but the sand is always blowing. My djbellah protects my entire body."
    The son then asked: "But Father, what about those ugly shoes you have on your feet?”
    "These are 'babouches' my son,” the father replied. You must understand that although the desert sands are very beautiful, they are also extremely hot. These babouches keep us from burning our feet."
    Son asks "what is that black tent mom and sister are wearing ?"
    Father :" It's called a burkha , it helps the hot desert sand from hitting the face and body during a sandstorm" .
    "So tell me then," added the boy.
    "Yes, my son…”
    "Why are we living in Birmingham and still wearing all this shi#t?
     
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  6. Aurora et luna

    Aurora et luna Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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  7. JOHNLGALT

    JOHNLGALT Well-Known Member

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    My JOTD was when I was silenced by somebody on the Silver Discussion site with these messages. Insufficient privileges indeed FREE SPEECH???
    DISCUSSION HAS BEEN CLOSED.JPG
     
  8. Shaddam IV

    Shaddam IV Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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    You just need to insert more coins.






    .
     
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  9. JOHNLGALT

    JOHNLGALT Well-Known Member

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  10. Stoic Phoenix

    Stoic Phoenix Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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    ^ There's your joke of the day people
     
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  11. Oddjob

    Oddjob Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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    JLG....there's nothing wrong with the truth or the discussion, however it was the thread had gone off topic and closed. Probably should have been a separate thread and let it run it's course.
     
  12. shinymetal

    shinymetal Well-Known Member

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    It was somewhat off topic, but aspects Qanon is fundamental in understanding the future Gold, and the coming gold standard.
    Although it's a very broad subject and easy to get distracted in rabbit holes that aren't about metals at all.
    I feel the side track explanation of Q was relevant. but mods will mod
    I wouldn't take the closing of the thread as censoring truth.

    I'll add a joke since this is a joke thread.

    Why did Hillary Clinton cross the road?
    Because she was chasing down someone who was going to give evidence against her.
     
  13. Stoic Phoenix

    Stoic Phoenix Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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    Hilary went to the doctors and said "Dr I have all these grazes on my knees and elbows"
    He has a look at them closely and asks Hilary "How did you get them?"
    She replies "I was doing it doggy style on the garage floor"
    "Why didn't you lie on your back?" asked the Doctor.
    "No way" Says Hilary "I can't stand the dogs breath!"
     
  14. JulieW

    JulieW Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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    A doctor enters a consultation with a report in his hand.

    “Good news, Mrs Smith!” he says.

    “That's Miss Smith Doctor” she replies.

    “Bad news I'm afraid Miss Smith."
     
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  15. JulieW

    JulieW Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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    Hillary Clinton was hustling for votes in rural USA and visited a pig farm. The photographer snapped her in her pink gumboots and yellow raincoat beaming wildly at the camera. Everyone agreed it was a great shot.

    In the campaign office, the staff were discussing how to caption the picture.

    "Your future President Hillary Clinton squeals for Iowa pigs," suggested one.

    "No, it should be, Future POTUS Hillary Clinton loves Iowa pigs," said another.

    No - "Pigs surround Your future President Hillary Clinton in Iowa" said another.

    All the captions are rejected.

    Finally Campaign Manager John Podesta says he'll ask Bill Clinton, a man of the people, what caption will put Hillary in the best light.

    He returns with the decision.

    "Third from left – Hillary Clinton"
     
  16. Aurora et luna

    Aurora et luna Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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  17. Aurora et luna

    Aurora et luna Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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  18. Aurora et luna

    Aurora et luna Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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  19. Aurora et luna

    Aurora et luna Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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  20. alor

    alor Well-Known Member Silver Stacker

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